to obsess is to feel joy. to feel whole is to sell myself on my critique. i obsess over art and the beauty and intricacy it has to offer. aesthetic cohesion; the weight of a swing or an inflection in music.
i think i've become a fundamentally incurious person. someone with base literacy and the ability to form opinions and bias, but i've lost any old drive i once had.
i don't feel passion for things any more. i don't cheese
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