to not peak

it took me time to warm up. till max, kianoush wasn't the most connected person. in a way, neither were mus or lee. him coming was a blessing i think, given he's easy to talk to. through him im a little warmer with mus and lee now

and number 1 is still just there. he seems disconnected, utterly. chalant and nonchalant in just the right ways to cause friction. a total sponge

i didn't want a sponge, i wanted a rally. i found one through 2, and i worry something's going to fall through

i hope he feels the fucking pressure now